How do I discipline my child?

The Parenting Podcast that changed it all.

“How do I discipline my kid or keep my kid in line if I don’t fly off the handle?” Questions like that are what Heidi Swapp is approached within the Costco parking lot, or at any other public location, she shows her face in. Heidi has unexpectedly become a “parenting expert”.

Heidi was known as an early industry leader in the world of scrapbooking in the early 2000s. Creative ladies everywhere loved her funky style of design and enjoyed seeing her creations featured in magazines and on QVC. She also traveled for nationwide events. But in 2015, Heidi lost her son Cory to suicide and everything changed.

Unexpected Partners

David Kozlowski, a licensed family and marriage therapist in West Jordan, Utah, was Cory’s therapist before his untimely death. David spent a lot of time with the Swapp family as they worked through their tremendous grief and Heidi started taking a lot of notes. One thing became very clear to her… David knew a lot about parenting and relationships, and she thought every parent should have access to this helpful information.

Heidi was right! In 2018, David and Heidi became unexpected partners by creating a podcast called, “Light the Fight” and it is fantastic. The pair meet up and have conversations about parenting and relationship issues and then they bring it to the podcast and educate their listeners. Heidi is the mom and David is the therapist.

My lightbulb moment

I have received great information out of every single episode that I have listened to but I didn’t know what to expect in the beginning. Would it be too hard for Heidi after losing her Cory? As a scrapbooker, I was already familiar with her work and loved it, so I thought I’d give it a try and I’m so glad I did. 

Light the Fight is one of those podcasts you listen to and are able to immediately put into action what you have just learned. Sometimes it’s so good, that you want to stop the recording, rewind a bit and take notes (like Heidi did).

Although I get something from every episode, my lightbulb moment came when I listened to episode 8 called, “Less Blow Up Equals More Follow Up”. Wow. At that point, I knew I’d need to share the podcast with all of the parents I knew. Lightbulb moment.

Listen for yourself

One might be thinking by reading the title of the episode that you know what it’s about, you know what it means and you’ve got it. Don’t be so sure! I encourage you to listen to it. David uses the example of “Little Johnny” who skips school and has to deal with consequences. Dad doesn’t blow up or freak out, he simply informs Little Johnny that the school called, he knows he missed school and informs him (calmly) that Little Johnny knows what that means (consequences).

It blew my mind. Wait. We’re not supposed to get mad and yell and ask why our child cut class or didn’t call to check in when he was supposed to or (fill in the blank)? What a concept! Set up consequences with your children, make sure they are clear and understood, and then if they mess up, they deal with the consequences.

Now naturally, this won’t work for every situation, but why not give it a try? Starting it now may help your family relationships and engagement! Blowing up isn’t fun for anyone and it causes upset and distance. The “traditional” way leaves our kids with the feeling that he or she has disappointed us and life is stressful enough already.

You won’t be disappointed

I highly encourage you to listen to episode 8. Don’t worry, I didn’t give it all away. It is truly outstanding and you will want to subscribe to the podcast! It’s beneficial to all types of relationships, and Heidi and David’s interaction will also make you laugh.

Heidi is still a lady who “likes to make pretty things”, a wife, and a mom. David is still a Family and Marriage Therapist and a family man (who loves to surf). Together, they are Light the Fight and they are providing amazing tools for the rest of us. Great job Heidi and David!